Whenever I meet a second-grade student, I always joke, “I spent two of the happiest years of my life in the second grade.” Adults laugh but the child rarely gets it. The irony is, while most think it’s just a joke, I did repeat second grade, and I might add, they weren’t the happiest years of my life. I was a child with a special need that wasn’t discovered until second grade. Somehow, I had managed through preschool, at home, and at church, to hide the fact that I was almost completely deaf in my left ear. Fifty percent hearing meant that I often got in trouble for not listening or for talking when I asked a friend what the teacher said. The breaking point was getting detention for cheating when I was merely looking at a student’s paper to see what I was supposed to do, since I couldn’t hear the instructions.
Once my handicap was discovered, life improved dramatically! I was moved to the front of the classroom and teachers started making sure I had both heard and understood. A second year of second grade was offered so I could catch up and improve my language skills. I wasn’t trying to be difficult or rebellious — I just had a need that required attention and some minor accommodation. Once my handicap was discovered, I went from feeling unloved, picked on, and “different” to accepted, understood, and cared for. The difference in my self-esteem was profound.
As a children’s ministry leader, you have children with special needs in your midst. Some are obvious. But there are many that have hidden or undiscovered needs. Parents may be unaware or unwilling to address special needs. So how can you make sure that every child in your ministry feels welcome, loved, and understood?
Create a Loving Environment. Make sure every child is noticed, welcomed, and addressed individually. Don’t be afraid to ask a child if they need help or if some minor change would make class time easier for them.
Cultivate a Safe Environment. Don’t expect every child to sit still and be completely engaged every minute of your program. We aren’t ministering to miniature adults. God has entrusted us with little people who are still developing into who God made them to be. Often what appears to be bad behavior is simply a child trying to cope with a difficult situation. Be gentle and seek to help, not just correct.
Communicate with Parents. We minister to parents, too. While we are working with a child for an hour or two, parents face the same challenges all week long. Don’t just report bad behavior. Instead, ask how you can help their child succeed. Offer to pray and be supportive. A parent may be weary of reports about their child. Express love for their child and how happy you are that they are in your ministry.
Keep in mind, that while we often consider children with more obvious challenges as having “special needs,” every child is unique, and each and every child deserves our personal attention and love. We need to treat each one as an individual worthy of love, patience, respect, and as much accommodation as we can provide.
Our goal isn’t to have a completely controlled classroom — it is to minister to each child according to their needs. And that includes every child! Every kid has special needs. Some just have more than others.
You can access this entire magazine for free here: Edition 41
